Dear Abby: Fighting parents put kid in the middle

Dear Abby My parents got into an argument because my father saw my mother looking at an old photo of herself from when she was younger It had been sent by her cousin via text In it she was sitting next to an ex-boyfriend or friend My father thought it was disrespectful but my mother didn t agree Mom thought it was trivial for him to get upset since she was only or and the photo was taken years ago It was way before my mother had even met my father Later she mentioned to Dad that she remembered seeing an old picture of him and his ex-wife dressed up for a concert He denied it and she didn t get upset She explained me later she doesn t regret receiving the picture because she no longer has romantic feelings for my father You see my parents are not legally married they are just roommates splitting the bills together I don t know how to feel about this I don t want to be involved but they both have come to me separately expressing their feelings about it What are your thoughts In the Middle in Texas Dear In the Middle I suspect that your father was less upset about the arrival of that -year-old photo than he is about the fact that your mother no longer has romantic feelings for him I also think you should stay out of this and no longer allow yourself to be put in the middle which is what your parents are trying to do Dear Abby An old friend of years has of late been diagnosed with early Alzheimer s She s still conducting her life as usual driving and taking care of her banking etc However she has lost her filter and talks to me about my figure Your thighs are shockingly thin and also my medical Are you going to die My mother had a cough like that and she died I am struggling to control my anger at her presumptuousness and holding myself back from various very apt and mean comebacks I don t seem to be able to let this go I don t want to abandon her during this time I took care of my husband with dementia for years but at the same time I don t need to spend weeks spinning after her insensitive and cruel comments Any ideas Insulted in San Francisco Dear Insulted If your friend is still well enough to conduct her life as usual she is also well enough to be notified that you don t appreciate her comments You don t have to jump down her throat but do tell her that if they don t stop she will be seeing less of you When her Alzheimer s worsens you may have to repeat it or redirect the conversation away from you Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren also known as Jeanne Phillips and was founded by her mother Pauline Phillips Contact Dear Abby at www DearAbby com or P O Box Los Angeles CA